Thursday, January 24, 2013

"I could see you're only telling. . ."

It's an unfortunate thing when a lot of what our society is based on is lies. We lie in order to feel better about ourselves, lie so we don't hurt others, lie so we can get out of something we don't want to do?
    In my personal experience, when I am lied to (even if it is to save me from getting my feelings hurt), my ability to trust that person has diminished a great deal and I put that person on the same generic level as others who have hurt me. They may redeem themselves, but in the back of my head, there is always going to be that lingering doubt or question, "are they telling me the truth?"
    Personally, I would prefer for my feelings to be hurt by someone telling me the truth when I ask something. That way, I don't have to worry about them ever holding something from me.  Regardless, 9 times out of 10, I find out the truth and I can tell you, it hurts more than the initial truth. Much more.

    I understand we are not all perfect, but it would be nice to have someone be completely honest with me, 100% of the time. I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering, "are you really in love with me? Is that really the reason you turned me down? Is that really the reason our plans were canceled? Is that really the reason you don't want to be with me? Is there really nothing wrong?"
    I'll admit, I have told my little white lies in the past, but I have mended my ways and I feel that I am genuinely an honest person, and I pride myself in that. Yes, I still slip up, but I almost always go back and correct my wrong.

    One of my best friends, ever, gave me this book that I had mentioned in passing to her. It is a book that I feel that all of us should read! It's called "Tiger, Tiger, is it True?" By Byron Katie.

    It's an amazing book that teaches you a new way of thinking. "Is it true that your family doesn't love you? No, they do things all the time that show you that they care about you and love you!" My point here is, just because you have someone lie to you, doesn't mean they don't love you, like you or whatever, but it still does not justify a lie.  At the end of the day, the only person you can count on going to bed with you and waking up with you, is yourself.

    The only thing constant in this world is change.

    To end on a different note, those of you who don't know, I am leaving for LA on the 13th of February. I am headed to the Kennedy Center American College Theatre Festival to present the production of Charm that I was in, and I also get to compete in the Irene Ryan competition as well! We will return on the 17th to finish the run of Will Rogers Follies at Weber State. Both are super fun shows! Since my friends in Utah can only see Will Rogers, come see it!

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